Many Ideas in Junk

Well, have you ever felt upset because you have a lot of ideas in your mind, but you can't make it real?
I felt it again and again and deep in my heart I just so jealous with people who can express their ideas.

You want to be a doctor because you like to help people, beside your grades are perfect, but you have no money to go to college or maybe your father asks you to help him in his shops or something.
You want to be a journalist because it's interesting for you and it's your passion, but your brother is sick and your family sacrifices their time and money for him, so it's not appropriate to ask your parents about your passion.
Once you win a photography competition and the money can pay your own school needs, you're so happy because you earn money from your passion, but later you can't buy films or even print your photos because actually your parents prepare the money only for your school, not more, and you have to work for your own passion if you are capable to.
But.. if you are a well-off person and have no problems with your passion or maybe your parents are rich, you do not have to be so worry.

I love playing piano/keyboard, and dad gave me one, but I couldn't have a piano lesson. God gives me ability to learn it on my own, even it's not that perfect. I don't really waste my talent, do I?
I love creating necklace and woman's accessories when I was in junior high, but my tools are not that complete, so i give up.
I love making stories, but there's no time anymore to type it. I'm not that young anymore to have a free time.
I love photography, but has no money for that. It's for my daily needs.

When I was in Jakarta and my father still work, I usually went to malls and plazas in that city, or maybe Bandung. In my era, PG (not a real name haha) is a very classy plaza. I love it. Sometimes, we just ate at hokben or buy things. This lifestyle influenced my woman's passion about shopping and fashion. Now, I should put aside my glamorous things, but I still can mix and match my clothes and dresses to be like my tasty style, but still, I just so jealous to someone who can buy materials and make it into dresses and pay the tailor, or maybe this person can sew it herself/himself.
People say I didn't try hard, I wasted my money, I just not into it, and things that let me down.
Actually, I can make my ideas come true, but maybe it's just not the right moment.