You Can't Always Get What You Want, Girls.. (Relationship)

You want to marry a man with brown skin, but all you got is a light skin man.
He is more mature, have a steady job, you are so click with his family, but you both are so confuse about your different religion. You plan to have 2kids, one is in the same religion with you, the other with the father, but how if God only give you one? You wanna marry in your church, while your mother in law suggest a Catholic church. You both are agree with this different religion and won't make it into problems, but you don't even know how it works. You don't know if the Father is agree or not (in Catholic, it depends on the Father's decision).

You wanna have many experiences in relationship/having boyfriend, but all you got is one for almost 4 years. Sometimes you think you're not brave enough to secede from this relationship and find another fresh relationship. You wanna taste another love, but you just can't resist this one, so you just can't stop no matter how bored you are even though this one is an ignorant. It makes you become so fretful and annoying (even you say to yourself that you become someone you don't wanna be, you become so sucks).

You wanna have a relationship which last forever, husband who can sing or play music, but you meet so many boys who can sing or play music, and you try to find your prince in them. Finally the one who becomes your husband, he can't sing or play music, but he's mature and can take care of you, while those Ex's can't. You always pay yours and your boyfriend's meal, pay his ticket, pay things; because most of them didn't have a steady job, while they follow your lifestyle. Now, you were take care by your fiance.

You wanna have someone you can count on and multitasking, so that he can be a figure of a man and a father you can rely on, can take care of you, but all you got is a boy who still stuck in his own world, clumsy, still learn how to be a man, and ignorant. Yet, the boy is accepting you with your own weakness and wanna try hard to find happiness for close people surrounding him. He always try hard to make you comfortable (try hard to push aside his selfishness, try really hard), while you always complaining and afraid of everything. Sometimes he is wrong, but he always try to make it up.

You wanna be a number one, but all you got is a man (the first child of a family who didn't do anything for his family yet) who loves another thing first and make you almost the last. He used to spoil you, but now you see how close he is with his family. Somehow, you feel left behind. You both are so click, the religion doesn't matter, adaptable in any lifestyle, but you feel hesitate with the family.

You are in love with your boyfriend. You love him so much, and so does he. Religion doesn't matter, he's not handsome, but you feel very comfortable around him. You know he's the one, but not your/his family. It turns out that (your family and his) they are sworn enemies. Maybe it because the race, religion, or other dissent. You might be think your story is the same as Romeo and Juliet's. You and him try harder to past the avalanche. You know people can't choose love, but love chooses you. There must be a reason why you and someone that your family dislike are in love. You believe God gives the best way for you to live. You hope that Romeo and Juliet are be with you now.

Geez.. You can't always get what you want. A friend of mine said that lovers always have a main problem as a basic in love (as long as it doesn't hurt you or him). Sacrifice is needed, but understand each other is a must. I don't always right, but those stories and facts are real. Me myself still confused, sometimes sigh, but I would love to talk about it. We can plan everything, so that we have a standard, but reality doesn't come based on what you want.

*Results of my conversation with a friend who will soon be engaged

Jakarta's Public Transportation: Kopaja

There are a lot of public transportation in Jakarta. Metromini/angkot, Kopaja, TransJakarta, Ojek (motorcycle),  Bemo, etc. I've never been in Bemo, because I think Bemo doesn't appear in all Jakarta.
Me myself, since I worked at Cikini  last August, that was the first time I had to use Kopaja to get to my office. KOPAJA is Koperasi Angkutan Jakarta (Jakarta Transport Cooperative). What I see about Kopaja.. Kopaja is a bus with seats, but a lot of people would stand up in the middle or even near the door (by the way, the door is always open, even when inside the bus is full). It has no air conditioner. We must stand huddled, so others get a place. There's always women with skirt, and I can't imagine how hard she keep her skirt stay neat and polite.

At first I was afraid, because of so many stories about thug or bad people in Kopaja. When I saw so many women fight for their life against crime in Kopaja, I became bold. I mean..
They work everyday and use Kopaja to get to their work place. They are women, with long hair, short hair, with skirt, trousers, make-up, no make-up, backpack, handbag, employee, student, mother, etc.
So, why should I be afraid of it? I love this city full of crime, and they are in the same position like me. When I have to use public transportation, I put my face as if I do not care about surrounding me and pretended to be clever and knew everything( of course at first I ask my friend and cousins about which should I pick to get somewhere and learn from map). They see me as if I did not hesitate and confused.

New Blog!

Guys, I made a new blog called Messy Shelf. It contains my review and opinion about movies and books that I've watched and read. Usually, I just write the good one. Well, so far..
Anyway, the language I use is Indonesian, but sometimes I use English (Just follow my head. Sometimes I forgot the Indonesian or the English of a word).
This blog is not an expert, just something I like. You can find some good movies and books here. Most of all are Horror movies and Children Literature books, because those are the most favorite things for me. Don't go away, because you can find another genre (impossible if I just watch and read those genres).

So please come to my new blog and give comment ^_^
http://messyshelf.blogspot.com/

Dear Buildings

Exhausted, tired, but quite happy!

Today was a long long day!

Last night I ordered Taxi Gamya to go to Balai Kartini (Kompas Karir Fair/ Job fair) in the morning at 7.30. In the morning, I woke up and was busy texting my friend, Citra, to meet in Balai Kartini. In Balai Kartini we were queuing to insert our resume to KKF's data base and exchanged our online ticket. We were queuing about an hour. Yesterday, I was alone queuing and walk fastly from booth to booth. So, yeah..you can imagine. After we did all the procedure, we started to look for a job, we were walking from booth to booth, and applying for jobs that we want in some companies that we really want. We went home by TransJakarta and we strayed, we missed a busway stop, so we had to go back. Thank God, we just had to pay once.

Anyway, Citra and I were not in the same destination. She wanted to go to Cilandak, and I want to meet my special friend, Lando, in Mall Ambassador.

The most exhausted part is.. I walked from ngg..Rasuna (I guess) (Dukuh Atas-Ragunan Busway) to Mall Ambassador. I didn't take any public transportation. I thought I saw the mall from a distance, but then I realize it's another building. Sucks..

If only you knew the mileage,the sunlight, and the temperature. I felt like stranded in the desert.

Then THE HEAVEN was seen! Mall Ambassador. I walked like a sprinter and sit around the Mall's sliding door, waiting for Lando. I texted him, and he said he's on the way. I was so tired and had no water to drink (I lose it in Balai Kartini). After 15minutes or maybe 30, I texted him, and he said he was here, around the mall. I've been looking for him, but then he showed up and I was 'huh?! who are you?' for 3seconds.

"The real HEAVEN is come!"

Old and Still Best Friend

minus Sissy

People need each other to live. You may thought about your beloved; parents, brother or sister, best friend, or usually boyfriend or girlfriend. Parents might be the one who knew everything, but sometime they won't listen because they always think that they are right. Sister and brother? Well, I have a young sister and we talk usually only when we need to. Boyfriend? I still not sure that he's the one who'll be with me 'till the end.

 I love them all, but I need a person who want to hear my story without worrying about he/she will disappear and hate me or will never meet me anymore.

I have forever friends that I absolutely sure, they won't leave me till the end. Just like a husband in marriage (based on my type of a husband -no divorce thing-).

myrs: meilisa,yaya,rani(me),sissy. We don't mean to make a group of special people or something, but we just feel so clique with each other like nothing is hidden. We still make friend with other people, but we still share our lives and take care each other from a distance. We split into Jogja, Bandung, Jakarta, and Singapore.

I feel that our souls become one every time we meet or just sharing stories.

Sound excessive, but that's how I feel

24

I feel too old.
I read requirement for some jobs, and they said the minimum age for applicant is 24.
I saw my friend's husband, and his birthday today is 25. They are happy, young, and have a child.
I'm 23 and done nothing. This years, I'll be 24.
Can you imagine that?!
I plan things and ruined things. If you say I have to go hiking or travelling or get a job which suits my passion... It's easy to say.
The first child of a retirement 65 year's old dad. 65 which is old enough to see her daughter success, married, and hold a grandchild. I waste my days with thinking about my future while my skills are not as good as people and not enough to survive in this world. Thinking about how if I just married an-already-success man? hahaha well, it's not easy too. Nothing is easy and I just can't take everything simple.

If you still can enjoy your life like go overseas just for fun or exchange study and it's okay if you still study even when your age is 25 maybe, you're lucky. If you can enjoy the romantic world; your love take you to romantic places and guide you anywhere you go maybe, you're incredibly lucky. If you can find a job which really into your passion, you're lucky. If you're brave enough to take any job you've found, you're awesome.
I'm not like you, and I don't know if I can be like you. I envy. Really..

I just have to be brave to live my lucky life..
I have best friends, family, and a lover in my limited situation.
24, please be kind.